Drag Race Episode 14
Part 1 Ruba walks up to the screen, red lipstick on, wearing fishnet stockings and lingerie and smoking a cigar. She stubs the cigar on the screen, kissing the ashy stub as she whispers "Welcome to Drag Race. The Winner will receive a headline spot on the Glee Wiki® Pride Tour, a sickening supply of makeup from the Ana Mijatovic collection, and 100,000 puffle points‏. Gentlemen, Start you engines, and may the best woman, WIN!" The queens all come out in beautiful, sexy drag for the RU-UNION. They all sing smash hit "burqa buziniezz" feat. hibo dahir on stage for the live audience. As they take a seat and Rubaul makes her grand entrance. "Now... first up, we have our most iconic queen... one loved by many... known for her sass, her gorgeous runway looks and her lovely personality. It's ANNIE JENNER!" Annie comes on stage, escorted by two policemen, past the 16, soon-to-be-filled seats after the queens make their entrances and are interviewed by rubaul. Annie is placed in the seat next to Rubaul as she screams "FUCK RHONDA SHE BROKE MY HEART" and the audience cry and wave their handkerchiefs at her. "Now.. Next up is our mexican friend from across the border... LOLA LUNCHEON!" Lola walks up and throws burritos at the audience before sitting down. "Ah yes it is so good to be here in the you ess of a" She says in her Chechen accent before sitting down. "And thirdly... stand back, because she might give ya toothache! It's GINGER VITIS" Ginger comes out in a tooth costume doing one of her "comedy queen" skits and Roxxxy Andrews fucking hates those comedy queens just riding on by. "Last, but not least. The icon of the season... SUSIE SHITSTREAK!" Susie comes out, toilet paper on her shoe and a shit streak on her white dress. Roxxxy gets tired of these comedy queens and goes to punch Susie. But Susie is a pageant girl and didnt realise she shit all over her dress and this was all an accident and she's now embarrassed. "So... You were the first four eliminated, But Annie. How did it feel to be the first to go?" Annie smiles and nods. "Yes..." Rubaul just smiles back awkwardly. "Nyu-huh. So whats the deal between you and Rhonda?" Annie smiles "Yes, Yes I love it here..." she replies. Rubaul stands up "okay some get this illiterate bitch outta my site." It takes several minutes to sedate Annie and her ego before she is forced to leave. "Sorry about that girlies... Now, Lola Luncheon, give us the deets. Is it true that you shoves a taco in Susie's... taco before she came out here?" Lola just rolls her eyes "WHAT THE FUCK WHY DOES SHE HATE ME WHO THE FUCK LIKE I WAS JUST DOING MY HOMEWORK WTF?" Susie stands up, clearly pissed at Lola. "YOU WERENT TALKING TO ME, NOT MY FAULT BITCH YOU SHOULD HAVE SPENT MORE TIME WITH US MAYBE WE'D LIKE YOU" They start to scream at each other as Ginger sips on her tequila. Part 2 The screaming match continues, but the fugly come out and perform a fugly de-initiation on Lola Luncheon, who's a bit pissed off tbh and leaves the chat. No one has any idea why and everyone is confused but they hate each other anyway. The fuglies leave as Ginger just finished her Tequila and is a bit tipsy because her religion doesnt allow it. Rubaul faces the jaded queen. "So... Ginger, babe. Who do you think should win?" Ginger starts to strut towards Rubaul, one tit hanging out her dress. "Well, Rubaul... We should get in a back alley and do the deed." The world is shocked by the lesbionic ruveal and Hibo passes out in the audience. Rubaul takes her into the back alley and they do the deed. Rubaul sells her six ounces of laced cocaine and they come back on stage. Ginger is snorting the coke like a dumb hoe. "Now, Susie. You won a week and you were doing so well, what was your downfall?!" Susie purses her lips. "Probably because...." There is a huge pause "They all felt like pussy and I feel like cunt." Rubaul tells all those whores to get into their seats, one being taken away as they found out Annie Jenner was a Mexican murderer names Paco Del Rosa and is being taken to Lichfield prison as we speak. "Now... for our next queen. One question has been on out minds for this bitch. WHAT DID CHER DO?! A woman that needs no introduction. Well, except this one. Miss, CHER NOBLE!" Cher comes out, waving to her fans, crying. "It's just so good to be back, Rubaul." "Now, Cher, lets get to it. What did Cher DO?!" There is a pause. "What didn't I do?" A noise can be heard in the distance "On drag race? Not fucking much." There is a small amount of laughter as Cher throws a knife at the source of the sound, the knife hits Santino Rice and kills him but no one cares. "Ok so basically I was smoking crack with my buddy Katya and we got caught fucking and smoking crack and i got cumdrunk and it was a mess i threw up all over lady ratchet. At least it improved her look xo" The audience piss themselves and Cher goes back to her seat. The rest got interviewed and it was funny then they crowned their winner. Ruba stands at the front. "and the winner is........" They all look around nervously as Lily Summers jumps to the front. "IF YOU DONT LET ME WIN IM SUING YOUR ASS FOR UNFAIR TREATEMENT, YOU WERE RACIST TO PERRY ALL SEASON, YOU ATTACKED PEOPLE AND YOU LET CHEATING PASS BY." Ruba has no choice and crowns lily summers as the winner, Giving some of this season's robbed contestants a free pass into S2. Lily summers gets murdered by the queens who were ROBBED. "if u cunt lvu urself how in the hell u gona love someone else?!" "AMEN!" Category:Drag Race